The kingdom on the overworld has been covered in a dark aura of unknown origins. Something bad is going to happen if we don't send paladins immediately But, this isn't good. We had to send all our paladins to the underworld to fight the war. We've only got 3. We shall make another.
"WHERE'S MY CAKE, FOUL LOWLY COMMONER!" the king stuffed down an entire wedge of cake and held his hand out for another. "Sir, the gods have a message!" "Present it to me!" The king, King Nigel, said. The messenger knelt down dramatically on the cherry red carpet. "What dust thou the fuck think he is doing?!" King Nigel screamed. "Giving you the message..." The messenger said. "A King as worthy as me doesn't need to spend time reading! Read it to me or I shall have you raped and executed right here in front of me!" "It says 'the time has come to descend paladins from the heavens. They will come to assist shortly.'" The king dropped his cake on his carpet. "By gods...s-send the archers and knights out into the square!" Everybody rushed to the square and crowded around the paladin shrine. Soon, citizens joined the crowd. Then, the gate busted down the the castle. Guards rushed over and looked at the figures standing in front of them. "Move aside, King Nigel. We seize this kingdom as underworld territory! I am The Dark Lord, and these are my commanders!" The king looked over. "The underworld? I thought the paladins were fighting a war against you ruffians!" "Yes, they WERE. Was a very boring ending for them, lots of crying, then the white doves come and sweep the fallen up to heaven and all that shit...anyways, they're dead. And I want this kingdom. Move, peasant!" The dark lord sends undead skeletons and demons into the kingdom. "Hey, you lazy cockswiggers, attack!" The defense was no good,and the dark lord and his commanders marched up to the paladin shrine. "Destroy the shrine..." The dark lord commanded. Then, a light shined down from the sky and hit the shrine. 4 paladins dropped from the sky.
"4 more paladins to send back to the gods?" The lights wipe out the entire undead army. The dark lord is thrown to the ground, along with his commanders. "It's the paladins!" King Nigel cheered. "You! Commoner woman! Twerk for this new development!" "Honey, I want you to go out there and twerk like you've never twerked that ass before. Do it for the child we don't have!" The woman's husband said. "I will!" Then she twerked in front of the shrine as don't drop that dun dun dun played, and the paladins descended from the sky. As they landed they looked around, serious and stuff, but then one of them looked kind of off. "Oh thank you for saving us in our time of need!" Nigel got down on his royal knees. "Hey, what's wrong with that paladin?" "Oh him? Yeah, he's kinda new..." One paladin said. "I used to be an antelope!" He said. The dark lord frantically fleed from the fortress of fortification "OK, everyone just calm the hell down! We were sent from the heav- oh fuck it you already know. I'm Ted, then that's Justin-" "For the HEAVENS!!!" Justin screamed. "-Then he's Joey and the new guy's Windsor. We will all save you guys, as soon as this bitch stops twerking on my lap..." Ted said. "Did I do good? Did I save the nonexistent family we have?" The woman said. "Yes," The husband hugged her. "Yes you did." King Nigel jumped up and at on his throne. "To the banquet hall! All peasants and commoners allowed!"
At the banquet, everyone was sitting down, eating. The paladins were sitting with King Nigel, and Windsor started scathing "Is paladin armor always this itchy?" "Yep. And just wait 'till you get an erection." Ted muffled as he ate a turkey leg. Windsor went outside to scratch, when he saw a glowing red light down by the well. "Hey!" Windsor stupidly sounded off to the glowing figure. "oh...uh...hey kid...wanna see a magic trick?" He said. "OK!" Windsor rushed over and watched "OK, so I'm gonna take this vial of poison," "Uh huh, what next?" "Then, I'm gonna open the top," "NO FREAKIN' WAY! HOLY SHIT THE TOP IS OPEN!" "But then, I pour the arsenic contents into the well," "Holy titty fucking scrotum skin this is epic..." "And I...disappear!" Then he ran away. "Oh my self that was too cool..." Joey runs outside. "Windsor, what did you just do?" He said as he began to panic. "This cool magician poured dangerous magical chemicals into our only water supply...and... ooh..." Windsor looked kinda nervous. "You idiot! that was no magician! That was one of the dark lord's commanders!" "What's his name?" "Why do you need to know his name?" "So we don't have to say 'glowing figure of the dark lord's army' every time he appears or says something." "His name is skelz. He said it's cool 'cause he's got skills and he's a skeleton." Windsor looked up at disgust."That's gay." "But what are we gonna do about the water?"